Dancing with the Clouds- Olive Mazerolle

My passion started when I was a teenager, lessened when I was single and working long hours and re-started after a traumatic experience as one of many mental health tools to overcome the guilt and grief. Upon retirement, I joined a writing group, Women of Words (WoWs), where I was strongly encouraged to write and publish a book about my experiences based on the many journals I had written throughout the years. In late 2019, I was offered a scholarship with the Thriving Authors Academy (TAA) with author and writing coach Dallas Woodburn from California. I continued with TAA for 18 wonderful months and I learned a lot. There I found a community of writers who offered each other companionship, advice and support. A worthwhile adventure for sure and I highly recommend Dallas as a book doula. (Dallaswoodburn.com)

As a civilian employee, I gave thirty-five years of my life to the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. At the end of my career, after experiencing both personal and professional traumas, I found myself diagnosed with moderate-to-severe PTSD. Through years of seeking the psychological help I needed, I finally understood that my traumas had led me to Post Traumatic Growth (PTG). PTG was transformative and brought renewed growth after adversity. I turned towards altruism, opened up to new experiences, became spiritually mature and embraced gratitude for the life I now live, saying, “Without these challenges, I may not be the person I am proud to be today.” Healing from the immense grief and guilt led me to accept that life’s adversities are indeed life lessons. My cancer diagnosis led to a healthier lifestyle. Addressing sexual harassment in the workplace brought validation and restored my confidence. Most importantly, I recognized that anxiety can be controlled by a shift to positive thinking.

My writing process was very diverse. It took 5 years to write this book, going from writing every day for weeks and then not writing for months. Like a a roller coaster some days were up and other days were down. It was very triggering to write and my wonderful psychologist trained me to stop writing when it overwhelmed me, so that’s what I did. It took time and a lot of self-care. When I did sit at the keyboard, I had a thermos of tea, a candle, a few treats and my handsome shiatsu Toby. Having comforting things around me and my four legged fur baby at my feet brought the calmness I needed so that inspiration could flow, often losing track of time. Some days I just « vomit-on-the-page » typing at lightning speed, only to edit and re-edit a number of times until the first draft was ready for Beta readers followed by an editor.

Having control over the content… it is my private life experiences and I didn’t feel comfortable going with a publishing house that might make changes to my story.

The triggers and the flashbacks brought me back to the traumas and there were really difficult days. Beyond that, the decision to actual publish the book was also a difficult step to take as I was putting my personal life out to the universe. Now that I have, I have absolutely no regrets as a number of people have told me it has helped them in their mental health journey.

I wrote in Pages with the help of on-line Thesaurus and Grammarly and that’s it.

1- Your writing matters. If you have a message find a way to write it and send it to the universe, be it through fiction or non-fiction. 2- « vomit on the page », just start writing, let you fingers or pen go where it wants. There is always time to review and remove what you don’t like later. Don’t get stuck on the little things and soon you will see that you have enough for a book. 3 - Learn about imposter syndrome and work at overcoming it, just like I did. It wasn’t easy but it can be done and when the book is published it so so rewarding. 4- Don’t let writers block overwhelm you, it happens to everyone. Take a break, long or short, and then continue writing when inspiration resurfaces, because it will. 4- At your first draft, don’t worry about grammar and punctuation. There will be time for that later. Your self-editing, Beta Readers and editor will take care of that. Just keep going. 5- Enjoy the writing process, get comfortable, live your passion and be proud of yourself even if you have only accomplish a sentence, a paragraph, a page, a chapter in your day. Celebrate each step; be it with a simple glass of wine to a dinner out to a launch party like no other. Celebrate yourself. Writing a book is a big commitment and an even bigger accomplishment!

Marketing the book is my biggest challenge. Right now, my only on-line tool is FaceBook, Instagram, a local craft store and Amazon. I am having difficulty being taken seriously by book stores and book fairs. Doors have literally been slammed in face a few times. It is so frustrating…

As a group of 4, we the WoWs, are writing a true story of survival of an attempted femicide. This is also difficult to write because of the trauma this young woman had to go through. It’s title is Taking Back My Life - The Colette Martin Story. Hopefully published by 2026. (Empowermentbycolette.com for a glimpse at her story.)

It is available in English and in French: Danser avec les Nuages - Une histoire vraie de croissance poste traumatique.